now

Back then, i didn't know
how to see myself
through your longing eyes,
solitary when the mirror
gave a partial frozen image
that couldn't keep itself in your
soft mercy over disbeliefs.

i didn’t know how to cradle
your heart even less mine,
fill it with simple dreams and
reckless abandon for failure
or banishment. Love seemed
far away like a faint distant
beacon through the haze.

My fear risked nothing
still contrived to lose it all.
i stepped to the other side
of an open door then vanished
completely from your light
and witnessed a bright Virgo
drifting through the stars.

Would it be possible now
to retrace my missteps,
sift through the gritty sands
in this barren desert
and find the hidden oasis
waiting in timeless patience
for the traveler’s return?

Or it is simply too late
recollecting hopes in a porous
vessel for a life unbalanced,
and you would kiss me now
more in sympathy than regret
set me free like a lost dove
its troubled journey is undone.

*photo with permission and credit to Keith Watson of Ontario
http://www.flickr.com/photos/keith_watson/421991890/